We have all received a lump of coal for Christmas, right? It’s a very annoying thing when it happens as you need to show gratitude for something you know you’re never going to use. And if you’re anything like me, showing emotions you don’t mean is extremely hard. I personally like to ‘fool proof’ my life as much as possible and in order to do that, we need to flip things inside out. The way we flip this on its head; by placing ourselves on both sides of the gift, the giver and the receiver.


How many of us give a gift we want to give, rather than the gift the receiver wants to receive?

It becomes a habit to buy people the first thing you think of when they come to mind, like knowing a friend named Anthony has a fascination for birds. Or, eagles to be exact.

Can you imagine how many people would buy Anthony an eagle related present? Seriously, within 1 Christmas and birthday, he would have enough tacky eagle presents to question himself if he even likes eagles anymore. And you’ve got to think, there is a Christmas and birthday every single year which means by the age of 25, Anthony is going to have collected over a hundred eagle head souvenirs.


How do we break this habit, and find a way to gift someone with more integrity?

First thing is first, we must identify which of our loved ones we’ve been flooding with thoughtless repetitive gifts. And second, we need to get an idea on why they like what they like. If Anthony likes eagles, we need to dig deeper on Anthony and why he likes eagles as a matter of fact we need to ask ourselves - what do we know about Anthony to begin with?


All humans come with behavioural patterns. This is best observed by seeing what they do with their spare time and how they treat those around them, the environment that they live in will tell us a lot about the person.

Let’s look at an example;

Let’s say Anthony lives at home with his parents who have given him a sheltered life, he likes to go for hikes in the bush and to beaches in the national park with his spare time and he has a fascination for birds and planes.


I would definitely say Anthony is one who loves freedom and empowerment. When we think of eagles we think of the empowering powerful king of the skies. The plane is a quick thought of the freedom we have, the different cultures that exist and all the unknown adventures, while the thoughts of being in a national park with mother nature give us a taste of what it would be like to be free to roam. Just like the eagle.


Now that we understand why Anthony might like eagles, let’s ask ourselves what sort of gift can we provide Anthony with? Something that would truly make him happy, and even fills us with that form of fulfilment we desire in our selfless act of giving!

Some ideas derive from the words Empowering and Freedom such as; holidays, hiking gear, adrenaline based gifts and most importantly presence could be the best present for Anthony in his current life conditions.


Give someone a day’s trip to somewhere they haven’t been and that would mean the world to someone who wants to actively explore or go on adventures. Keep in mind, the best way to build trust is through support - in this sense we are supporting Anthony with his vision. He’ll consequently trust us and love the well thought out gift! Even if it costs nothing.


Two lessons to keep in mind from this blog

-         Are you giving your loved ones what you want to give them or what they want you to give them?

-         We build trust through support, to support someone we must show we understand their cause.


I hope this helps you all find the perfect gift for the perfect somebody this year,


Thank you for reading my blog and I wish you all a very Merry Christmas & a Happy New Year.

Aj Chand


Aj Chand